I always love friday nights after work. Those fast pace dinner plans withe the ladies. This time wrong it was a larger crowd with more laughter, smile and stomach aches. :D Dinner at town with the ladies has always been the best every since I started work. A push to keep on hanging. && they were very much understanding when I had to settle few work while we were having dinner. Thank you girls, you made my friday night awesome <3 div="" nbsp="">
Weekend shooting! A hardcore work week. Glad it's over but the season is not. Hang in there girl. Your ship is rocking but you'll stand firm. Wish me luck!
It't the end of the month, what does that mean?
$$$$$$$$$$ (yay!!!)
"It's already Thursday?!" "It has been a month already!"
Time flies fast when you're having fun. hahah. Yepp, trying to be optimistic here. Another episode to go this weekend yet we're still missing one thing. Final chance: Tomorrow. Hoping for the best. Wish me luck! :D
Let's back track a little bit. Guess who was nice enough to have dinner with me?
We were suppose to be at 4PM crew briefing but I had shoot and he heard that I was going to be there. Since we were free afterwards, I decided to ring him up and catch up. We had Shifa to join for a while. Went shopping for his mother's birthday gift and had lunch and maghrib at the mosque. :D
Ever got splashed by the opposite gender? Cause we did. :D
Dolah and Shifa wanted to splat some cheesecake on me when some defensive counter attack hit me. Can't imagine the situation? Well, it was pure drama. Girl got mad, girl splash water on guy, guy shocked, people gasp, girl stormed away. Yeah that story.. hahah! But this time it didnt just end that way. Guy filled cup. Guy drank cooly. Girl wasnt paying attention. Girl looked back and SPLASH! I bet the crowd from CBTL were confuse on what's going on. hahah. But it was a nice gathering. Awkward, hyper acting, stormy yet amazing. Thank you. :>
My colleagues that taught me things they could have never imagine.
I can't seem to find a right opening for this post. haha.
I begin to learn what school was trying to do for our future. For our work life. Of course i can't regret it now but I have to learn and do it. Maybe it's the same excat way what's life is all about. Today in the real world somewhere there it's trying to tell us something to prepare us for the hereafter. It's my choice now, to accept it or blind myself to it.
Honestly I begin to see things beyond what I expected. I begin to learn something about myself and others. I begin to know how to kill my old habits and the disadvantage of few other things. It has been a short ride but I see many thing I could never imagine.
Work got me closer to God. It helps me see how close and devoted am I to the Almighty. I left my comfort zone to see what is needed to be seen. I learn the simplest things my parents thought me and how little things matters. I learn that being in the comfort zone is dangerous. You hurt people. There's boundaries and limits to it. Being close to the comfort zone is another story. I learn to listen to what I have to say before saying. It's tough. To say and to talk it's not easy. Talking is easy but the content is hard. I see with my own eyes how people work to aim for the stars and now I know why I always fall for the skies. I learn and begin to understand the real meaning of reading, but I still neglect them. I can be caring, but I chose not to. But the smile and elated faces when I see those appreciative faces and gesture with my small offers, it brings sprinkles in me. I learn to work quick, I learn to work fast, nice and smart.
I begin to see who I am today, truly. And I begin to see how I can improve myself.
And to improve yourself is not easy. It takes practice and practice needs alot of determination, consistency and discipline.
It felt too close to what's going on right now. I can't only breathe it out and tell myself to breathe and endure. Pray everyday to have some strength to see what what's happening before my eyes. It's hard. It has been months, despite the effort and attempts, there's nothing else to fight for. "Shazaa you've let go too much of your ego already, let it go."
I want to give up, I do but deep down I'm still holding on.
I'm grateful that I got a job to worry and get stress about. (So thought won't drown me) I manage to figure out few things about myself and learn new things about life and expectations and experiences to keep. This week was a surprising. A day of epic moments, plenty of surprises and unexpected mental break down. Here's few:
1. People who know me would say I am very positive and optimistic. WRONG. There are levels of optimism and I'm not even place anywhere close to high optimism.
2. I lose my colors on my face and totally blanked out if I reached extreme stress-ness. Jannah was shocked to see me in that stage. Even I was surprise to experience that myself. I complete blanked out, stare at the thin air and took out my nothing box from my brain and think nothing.
3. Most of my friends who knows my stories, whom I'm comfortable with are girls. No wait, all of them are girls. I find it very uncomfortable to do it with any guys except for the exceptional who is decide to go MIA starting from now. Five years for listening aid, gone. No warranty.
4. Writing looks simple but it's damn hard! REALLY! You need to read for you to write. I got to start reading alot. I'm horrible at writing. Words really play a huge important role in the society. Judging are always wrong but if you judge right, you're just lucky.
5. I hate making phone calls! I am lazy! committed but lazy!
First week of work: CRAZY ALREADY!
I can't even catch a breathe and the storm gave me a bang in the head. I am Dorothy right now a.k.a spinning inside a house that is caught by a tornado into The Land of Wizard of Oz.
Truth: It has been very very challenging but I'm going to fight it! Every problem has its solution. Every way in there's a way out. I just have to think.
On the other side of the meadow, it has been fun. The crew and the production people have been very very nice and friendly. Although I just met them, they know how to keep everybody connected and cheerful whereas for this noob, I'm still learning. Kak Suriana have been very very very supporting and also patinece with me. She never fail to make sure I'm fine and push me to work harder. Apart from that Abg Harry the cameraman will always make sure I'm having fun and keep it calm. Not forgetting Kak Sha the make up artist and the client Kak Ainul for their presence has given me comfort and gave splendid support during my first few noob days.
One thing I learn is that the talents are ordinary people. It is just us who create them and put them in between us this wall. They are who they are because of us when they are just ordinary. I'm still trying to break that stereotype thinking inside me.
Well, I hope the future projects I will be well taken care off, learn more, meet more new people and change insyallah. Right now, I am grateful to God for giving me the strength and for always being there. I'm holding on tight. Insyallah one day.. just one day..
It's Monday! Done with Mai's four days stall at Expo. Been helping her almost all day from morning til night and it was awesome. It was very heavy hearted to leave just like that. I enjoyed the four days of entrepreneurship just to add in the experience to my experience box. I had great fun helping out and even meeting (insyallah) future schoolmates. Getting to know them and all. One thing I do miss is the Gelato there! fullstop.
So again, it's Monday which means... FIRST DAY OF WORK!
It was busy busy busy. I have to pay real close attention and act fast. I have to remember alot of things and work on it. When I thought things are getting done, slowly it piled up again. Well I enjoyed the fast paced cause it teaches me to calm down real quick and think fast. So far alhamdulillah, a nice first day. My mentor, Kak Suriana, the producer was the real deal. She helped me alot and was really cool. I could have not done it without her so I'm going to keep on trying my best and do well, Insyallah. Wish me luck!
Got myself an email and an access card. I feel sooo lucky. hehehe.
Left work with these ladies. Suddenly Screenbox was filled with many sweet hijab ladies. We got a thumbs up from Cik Mah. haha.
Will be shooting tomorrow. Assistant Producer on the set tomorrow. FIRST TIME! Scared but I have to remain calm. Again, wish me luck! Bismillah.
